Coach’s Corner

Dear Coach Walter,

Even though I’m hard at work with the launch of MLB TV, I just had to take the time to tell you that I have been a fan of the Prohibition Pirates for nearly 30+ seasons.  I have two questions that I have been DYING to ask you: first, how do you maintain those killer abs?  Secondly, and most importantly, what do you plan to do with your time when your playing days are over?

Sincerely,

Harold Reynolds(MLB TV host)

Thanks, Harry.

The short answer for the first question is that I’m in the gym 6-10 hours a day maintaining this god-like physique.

For the second, I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about my post-baseball career and here’s your answer: President of the United States.

My plate discipline and ability to organize the team should translate well to the role.  After foreign policy, the economy, health care, and the blah, blah, blah, here’s the meat and potatoes of my platform:

1. Baseball hats may only be worn one of two ways: straight ahead or backwards.  Anyone wearing their hat tilted to the side or any other “cool” way will be locked up for no less than 30 days.
2. If a restaurant/bar/sports arena/etc elects not to have paper towels in the bathroom, then they are required to have one of those heavy-duty blowers in there.  Those weak ones that do absolutely nothing are a waste of my time. You might as well just wipe your hands on your pants or bypass the sink altogether.
3. New Year’s will be relocated to June 1st.  Instead of cramming Thanksgiving, Christmas, Hanukkah, AND New Years into the span of 4 weeks, why not space things out?  Plus, people in the northeast can enjoy their New Year’s celebration without having to bundle up and risk freezing their faces off.
4. When attending a sporting event, if you must leave your seat, you should do so at a break in the action, NOT when Big Papi is at the plate in the ninth inning of a one run game so you can beat traffic.  Wait until there is a mound visit, timeout or other stoppage in the game.  You ruin the view of everyone sitting around you.  It’s rude, inconsiderate and just plain idiotic.  I promise the beer will still be lukewarm, there will still be a line to the mens’ room, and the hot chick you spotted from two sections away will not be as awesome as you thought.  This goes for those arriving late to their seats.  Stand in the tunnel until a break in the action then hustle to your seats.  There’s nothing I hate more than the self-important jerks who show up mid-way through the second inning and look around trying to find their seats oblivious to the fact that some people are trying to watch a game.  The penalty for this crime is no less than 60 days in federal prison and a sports appreciation course once released.
5. TV channels will be the same across the country and for every service provider.  The channels will be federally regulated and never changed.  This will allow us to know that NBC will be channel 7 for Comcast in Boston, MA, and it will be channel 7 in Gnome, Alaska, and channel 7 in Kalamazoo, Michigan.  It’s ridiculous that the cable companies can jerk us around like that and make us relearn a whole new channel lineup every 6 months.

In 40 or 50 years, when my playing career is winding down, I’ll reevaluate these points.  I’m sure that there will be other pressing issues affecting America, but if we all stick to these major points, everything else will be cream cheese.

-Coach Walter

(Jake Walter can be seen this Saturday from 1-2pm at the Extra Innings in Woburn.  He’ll be sweating profusely and trying his best to not look like a fool in the batting cages.)

Ask the Coach abs, ECABL, Harold Reynolds, Mailbag, Parkway Pirates, President

Dear Coach Walter,

First off, I’d like to say how much I admire and respect you as a coach. I am an inmate at USP Leavenworth and catch as many Prohibition Pirates of the Parkway games as I can on ham radio. I think your team has what it takes to go deep into the playoffs this season. I am anxiously waiting for July 20, 2009, which is the day I am eligible for parole. The first thing I plan to do is cross state lines to see a PPoP game with my own two eyes. I can’t wait to see Dan Bertrand in his hot baseball pants. The radio doesn’t do it justice I’m sure.

My question to you is this: How do you best defend against a steal of second while there’s a runner on third?

Sincerely,
Michael
Inmate 33765-183

Great Question Michael. First, that’s what she said.

There are a number of defenses against the first and third situation. I will talk you through three situations here. The catcher must first and foremost communicate clearly with the infield so that everyone is on the same page. The catcher usually uses hand signals to communicate the strategy with the rest of the team. 

The most straightforward play is to have the catcher throw straight through to second base. However, as the catcher is coming up to make the throw, he should take a quick glace at third to make sure that baserunner is not too far off the base. If he sees the runner is too far from third, he should hold the ball and either snap off a throw to third or run him back to the bag.

The second option is to come up and snap the throw to third without even looking at second. Both middle infielders should perform as though the throw is going to second.

The third is the “cut play.” Everyone should execute the same way they would for a straight throw through, except the second basemen (if the batter is righty) will cutoff the throw between the second-base bag and the pitcher’s mound. Ideally, when the runner on third sees the ball leave the catcher’s hand, he’ll break for home and when the ball is cut, the second basemen can make an accurate throw to get him at the plate. There are other modifications, but these are the three main options when defending against the steal of second with a runner on third.

Thanks for the question and keep them coming!
Coach Walter

Ask the Coach Mailbag, strategy

Dear Coach Walter,

As a young albino midget, I’ve always been interested in joining the Prohibition Pirates of the Parkway. When I read in the Boston Globe that you were recruiting for ball boys, I was more than ecstatic to think that my lifelong dream might soon become a reality. I can’t compete with Carl Lewis in a race, but I’m diligent in my pursuit of balls, even if I need to crawl through a little poison oak to get the job done. I hope I can bring the Pirates some luck along the way too.

My question to you is this: Why are there no left handed throwing second basemen  shortstops, or third basemen?

Thank you,
David “Stretch” McMullen

Hey Stretch,

Great question. Basically it comes down to what works best with the layout of a baseball field. If the bases were run clockwise, rather than counter-clockwise, the infielders would probably need to be left-handed. In today’s game, when a ball is hit directly at a position player, they must field, pivot and throw to first to record an out. If a lefty were faced with the same standard play, they would have to field and turn their body 180 degrees to make a throw to first. More importantly, when you take into account balls going to the left and right of the fielder, it makes it even more difficult to be left-handed. Even on standard plays, which aren’t that common in the ECABL, things can go wrong. Basically, the fewer steps involved, the better.

I hope this helps you out and good luck with your tryout!

Take ‘em deep,
Coach Walter

Ask the Coach Mailbag, strategy